These Squirrels Are Crazy! (And so much more!)

Judging by the title I've given this blog, you would expect me to talk about crazy squirrels. And you're right, I will. But there will be more. I don't know yet what the more will be, but I have a short attention span and an active brain so things will come up that I will want to mention before I can even finish with the squirrel talk. (Like now, I want to say stuff about my weird neighbor...) Back to the squirrels. They are pretty much nonstop squeaking and chirping. They keep running all over the place and chasing eachother in an angry way. Although I can't see their actual facial expressions so they could be playing. I really don't know. But I assume anger because that's more interesting. So I was trying to think of what they could be angry about. I would think it has to be food or territory related. They don't have beef with another squirrel for reasons like humans do. One of them didn't spill a drink on the other one at a bar. Or one squirrel didn't comment on another squirrel's facebook picture that she looks like a skank. Just basic animal kingdom problems I'm thinking. But then on top of that, the birds keep getting involved. I think the birds totally have the advantage here. They can FLY away at any time. They can drop gifts from above on unsuspecting squirrels. I miss so much while I'm at work. :( So the weird neighbor I briefly brought up before. I can't necessarily say he's a BAD neighbor, but he's not the best either. We live in an apartment. (I realize this is not my dream home, but when you're divorced and you start over and have to support yourself and a child, you do what you can do.) We live on the second floor and the neighbor, let's call him 'Paul,' lives below us. 'Paul' is probably about 45-50 years old. He lives with his girlfriend of roughly the same age, let's call her 'Deb.' She is pretty much inconsequential. I like her just fine. She's almost never home; she seems to work all day every day. Great neighbor. 'Paul' used to work. When we first moved in he had a car and I would see him coming and going. At some point in the last two years we've lived here, he stopped going to work and no longer has a car. I think of the 168 hours there are in one week, 'Paul' sets foot outside his apartment maybe a total of ten minutes. Give or take ten minutes. He's down there now. I can hear his tv. It's not ridiculous right now, but a lot of the time he has it so loud that his speakers literally vibrate the floor of my living room. My daughter gets mad and wants to confont him and tell him to quiet down. But I don't want to wake up with duct tape over my mouth one day because he's a bit of a creeper. I want to leave well enough alone. He was fairly friendly when we first moved in. Not anymore. He does not seem to like me. Which is fine. I'm not a friendly person. But I don't want to push him and end up a hot topic on Nancy Grace. I'm sad to say that after today there are only two more days of first grade. Second grade means she'll be turning eight years old. And I'll be turning thirty-FIVE. If she's growing up that means I'm getting old. I don't want either thing to happen. I jokingly told her the other day I was going to e-mail the teacher to have her not promote her to second grade, that way she'd have to stay in first grade and stay seven. I was joking only because it won't work. If this was a silly 80's movie with Tom Hanks or John Cusack I would totally do it and it WOULD WORK. But there was no e-mail in the 80's and I don't know where to find a magic wish granting gypsy machine and my drawings won't come to life so I'm out of luck. She WILL go on to second grade whether I like it or not.